Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
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Post by Elena Moon on Jul 25, 2020 21:17:37 GMT -8
Elena squeaked with joy when she saw the Seojin had left a space for her by holding her arm open. She happily squeezed into her spot and watched and listened to the options.
"I think I can do the turn. Turning is easy for me, but that jump thing might take me a second to adjust to. I know some flamenco so I think I can keep my upper body stiff for that." She turned and looked at Seojin, "you know, you're very sexy when you take charge and are in teacher mode like this."
A normal person would likely look away shyly after saying something so brazen, but Elena just watched Seojin from right beside her.
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
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Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 25, 2020 22:00:27 GMT -8
After Elena replied, Seojin said, "That's a good start we can practice the hop and kick move some by itself for you to get the hang of it -"
Her eyes went wide and she turned to look at Elena, shock clear on her face, instinctively clutching the other girl a little tighter. Her voice cracked and squeaked nervously as she asked, "Se-xy?"
She then realized that, for one, she'd tugged the other girl closer, and for another, they were looking directly at each other again. She was at a complete loss. Except maybe she wasn't imagining the lips thing. She had completely lost track of what she was going to say next, just staring at the other girl, her face full of uncertainty, but also not quite processing enough to loosen her arm.
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 25, 2020 22:14:59 GMT -8
"Is that not okay to say?" Elena looked concerned, "did I say it wrong?" she switched into English as if that would make it better, "I said I think you're very sexy when you take charge in this teacher mode of yours."
She quirked her head, looking at Seojin and flipped back into Korean, "was I not supposed to say that? Is it wrong for me to say? In Spain, you tell people they're beautiful when they're beautiful and they're sexy when they're sexy. But not in that weird, creepy catcall way. Are you okay?"
Elena waved her hand in front of Seojin's face a few times, "unnie?"
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 25, 2020 22:29:06 GMT -8
Seojin swallowed hard a few times, trying to figure out how to talk. She finally whispered, "Yeah, it's a little strange here to tell someone they're sexy if you aren't well like someone who is trying to flirt with them and stuff."
Her voice got smaller and smaller as she went, and she struggled over the word 'sexy' again. She couldn't quite look away from Elena as she added, voice tiny now, "I'm really really not used to cute girls calling me sexy."
She realized that she could let go at any moment, she could look away, but she couldn't. Elena was saying these things pressed along her side, and she added, finally, voice still very small, "I'm really confused."
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 25, 2020 22:48:08 GMT -8
"Who says I'm not trying to flirt with you?" Elena smiled. "I am flirting with you. Was that not obvious? Sorry, I'll have to make it more obvious in the future."
She crinkled her nose at being called cute, "am I cute because of this?" she pointed to her nose and crinkled it a few more times, being silly.
"Please don't be confused, unnie. I think if you start to see me interact with the other members you'll be able to tell I'm flirting. Spanish people do have a different definition of a personal bubble, but you've been standing in mine for longer than would normally be appropriate if I didn't want you this close." She said with a definitive nod.
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 25, 2020 23:00:20 GMT -8
On the list of possible directions this conversation could have gone, Seojin had not expected that one. She let go of Elena and sank to sit on the floor, putting her face against her knees, and said, "Oh my god, I don't know how to handle this."
People didn't just come out and say those sorts of things directly. And OK, she'd definitely been staring, and maybe kind of trying to flirt, and Elena had already figured out that she wasn't straight, and told Seojin that she wasn't straight either, so clearly nothing was normal here for Seojin.
She talked into her knees and said, "You're really really cute, and really nice and friendly, and we're going to be working together for years, and I don't think that I've ever interacted intentionally flirtatiously with another girl, and this is a lot. My knowledge of my sexuality has existed in a bubble of not having even the chance of doing things. I don't not want to flirt with you, I just really really don't know what I'm doing."
She looked up through the hair that had fallen in her face, trying to figure out what to make of Elena's reaction to all this, and she felt very young for her age and confused like she'd missed a training manual on all this somewhere. Elena was younger than her, but she seemed so confident about all this. And a large part of Seojin liked it. Another part wanted to try to get back to the dancing and just forget it happened, but the fizzy feeling in her stomach made her pretty sure that that wasn't possible at this point.
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 25, 2020 23:11:24 GMT -8
Elena followed Seojin down to the ground, sitting cross-legged beside her. "Unnie, it's okay. This is all very new to me too. I've never tried to flirt with a girl either, but it is fun," she brushed some hair out of Seojin's face, "I like it when you blush. Besides, no one says that we have to make a decision right now. It's enough for me to know that you think I'm cute and I'm glad you know that I think you're pretty." She shrugged. "Does there have to be more right now? Is there a thing we have to do right now?"
She stood up and held her hand out to Seojin, "do you want to keep dancing?" She opened and closed her hand like a kid, "unnie," she wriggled like she might throw a tantrum, but the smile on her face said she was being playful, "teach me to dance."
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
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Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 25, 2020 23:40:30 GMT -8
Seojin took deep breaths, listening to what Elena was saying. She shook her head and said, "No, we don't need to do anything else right now. We probably shouldn't. Everything's already moving so fast. I wouldn't have even thought of telling you that I'm not straight for months and months of maybe flirting, but you figured it out on the first day, and now things are very confusing. I think we need some time to figure out what this is and could be, and not to have things go to fast, but some things already went so fast that I'm overwhelmed."
She looked at Elena's hand, and took it, but she stood up using her abs in a fluid roll up. The hand was mostly just for reassurance. She said, "Yeah, we should get back to dancing. I don't take back anything that I said earlier, but can we agree no decisions before the debut showcase? Just focusing on that and getting to know each other better as people and groupmates? I want to be your friend first."
She felt a little more settled as she said it. The idea of a flirtation clicking into place, and the idea that this was someone she had some time with, where it wasn't a quick passing possibility.
Her voice was still a little shaky, but she seemed more back to being ready to lead when she said, "Let's work on the hop kick a little then?"
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 25, 2020 23:55:00 GMT -8
"First hour," Elena said unhelpfully, referring to how quickly she'd found out. "That sounds exhausting. You wanted to have knots in your stomach and be unsure of my feelings for months and months? I was frustrated spending the afternoon trying to prove that what I was doing wasn't just cultural. That sounds like a lot of work," she shook her head.
"Do I agree to the decision to not make decisions before the showcase, hmmm?" Elena stuck her tongue out at Seojin, "yes, I agree with the decision to not make a decision. Hop kick it is," she went back towards the center of the studio.
She tried to think about why she seemed so calm with the idea of flirting without freaking out. She decided it was probably because of her family. You couldn't actually date someone until the family approved, like all of them, so flirting was expected and just what you did.
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
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Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 26, 2020 1:33:48 GMT -8
Seojin sighed and gave an explanation, "It's not about even the flirting right away, it's sounding out to make sure that someone's not prejudiced, and that you're not going to be facing getting outed or beaten up or kicked out of your job or your family or anything like that. That's before even trying to flirt a little and see if someone seems interested even a little. I'd never even gotten as far as that second step because I'd never been sure on the first one. It's then spending a while testing the waters to see if you like someone enough to run the risk of coming out to them, of seeing if there's even a chance. I know it's not like that other places, and it's getting better here, but in an industry like this, with spotlights on you, any scandal, even something that shouldn't be, can ruin a career. It's not fun, and yeah, it's stressful, but the potential consequences of not being very slow and careful are potentially way worse."
She softened her tone and said, "I don't want to make you scared to be you. Just be careful, OK? It's very different from what you're used to. And you're a foreigner, so you get some leeway, but you're also a Korean foreigner, so maybe not always in public spaces."
Seojin shook her head, trying to dispel the serious tone. She went to join Elena at the center of the room and said, "Like this."
She showed the hop kick twice into the turn that she was talking about, and then looked at Elena, "You try."
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 26, 2020 9:02:30 GMT -8
Elena understood what Seojin was telling her but she didn't have to like it. "I mean I get it. It's not like Spain is completely understanding and I haven't come out to my parents or family because it honestly never occurred to me to do it. That being said, I know I'm one of the lucky ones and am not at all worried about coming out. I've got several gay and trans primos and the family has been completely supportive. My mom loves my tio's husband more than my tio," she laughed.
"For the sake of the group, sure, I'll be careful, but I'm not afraid of what people will say about me. Yes, I like it when people like me, but I'd rather be myself," she chewed on her lip, unsure if she was saying the right thing anymore. Seojin had said it herself, she wasn't trying to scare her, so why was she feeling uneasy.
She watched Seojin do the hop kick and tried it herself. It was easier than she'd expected, "how was that?" she asked, her tone a little flatter then usual.
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 26, 2020 9:49:55 GMT -8
Seojin could hear the uneasiness in Elena's tone, and she felt bad for having put it there. At the same time, she was pretty sure that it was important that Elena was thinking about this now. It had turned out OK with Seojin herself, but if Elena had brought some of the things up today with someone who was more repressed and reactive instead of just very closeted, that could have gone badly, and she didn't want to see the other girl hurt over something like that. She knew that in situations like this, some culture shock was inevitable.
Knowing that she was going to have some time to work this all out in her head, she focused on the dance. She watched Elena's hop kick and said warmly, "Good. You've got good body control and balance, and that's going to help with things like this. Let's practice it together, embedded with the rest of that segment."
She did the sequence of moves to show Elena, narrating them as she went, "Two hop kicks, turn to face and interact, turn and go forward with the hands, through 'No.'"
She focused on her enjoyment on adjusting the choreography on the fly to work for two people, trying to project with her voice that she was happy to be here and enjoying doing this with Elena.
She said, "Now let's do it together."
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 26, 2020 10:24:42 GMT -8
Elena followed along with Seojin's instructions, her attitude a little subdued now. Earlier it had been Seojin who couldn't seem to get out of her head, now Elena was facing the same issue.
She made several mistakes running through the choreography and shook her head to try and clear it. "Can I have some of your water?" she asked, going over to the bottle she'd used earlier. She had asked the question, but started drinking before waiting for an answer. Though it was the norm to use the waterfall technique in Korea when it came to sharing drinks from bottles, Elena did not have that norm in her system. She took a sip from the bottle, unaware she'd just completed the infamous indirect kiss.
She came back to the dance floor and pushed aside her conflicting thoughts, settling into a 'just dance' sort of vibe. "I'm good now."
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Idol (leader and main dancer of J.B.N.).
Lesbian.
Single, very closeted.
04/04/2002.
20.
Horse (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Woo Seojin on Jul 26, 2020 10:37:01 GMT -8
Seojin could tell that Elena was rattled. She hadn't meant to shake the other girl's confidence, but there was a small part of her that was relieved to see that Elena could be rattled. She nodded as Elena asked if she could have some of her water, and then was a little bit startled by Elena drinking straight from the bottle instead of pouring from slightly above her mouth. Seojin figured that that was a conversation for a different day, like prepping for water bottles on stage. There was definitely a small part of her that didn't mind the idea of the indirect kiss at all.
She said, "That was a little bit wobbly on the first try, but let's do it again. I know you have all the parts, so we just have to put it together in time with each other and the music."
She gave Elena a gentle smile and asked, "Ready?"
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Dreams Ent Trainee.
Bisexual.
Single.
04/13/2005.
17.
Rooster (Korea)
Authored by Velexa.
Offline.
|
Post by Elena Moon on Jul 26, 2020 11:26:46 GMT -8
Elena was able to slip back into focus. "I'm ready," she said.
She managed the choreography much better this time, focusing on the sharp movements and trying to make sure she hit them right. She watched herself in the mirror, rather than Seojin. She'd watched the other girl enough to know what the movements should look like, so she wanted to see how well she executed them.
She managed to get through the routine from the beginning until chorus, thinking it hadn't looked too bad. She looked to Seojin for her feedback.
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