Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on Mar 15, 2020 14:02:10 GMT -8
Josh wasn't normally nervous before first stages anymore. They'd been doing this for a while, but he'd checked social media before they headed to Inkigayo, and they were trending, specifically their showcase stage for "Happy Ever After" from the night before was trending, and there were a lot of positive comments. He wasn't sure if he should tell the others. He knew that some of them might have checked themselves, but he didn't want to make anyone else overly nervous if he could help it, and he didn't want to make anyone overly hopeful either. They'd been active for five years, without a single win in all that time, and he didn't really expect one at this point, but this was the most promising it had ever looked. He tried to shake it off and just let himself relax a little bit while sitting for his hair and makeup.
Taehoon stopped beside him for a moment and patted his shoulder and said, "You look nervous?"
Josh smiled up at him and said, "A little. I'll be good though."
He watched as Taehoon settled into his own chair for makeup and hair. Taehoon would be out of his before Josh was done most likely. That was how it always went.
He looked around at the others when he got a chance, trying to check how they were doing in the lead up to their stage.
Kim Kangwan Yeo Taehoon
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on Mar 27, 2020 18:09:27 GMT -8
Kangwan decided to check social media before he'd have to abandoned his phone in the dressing room, and was surprised to see they were trending. It made him excited, his first song to make an album and it was trending. It made him happy that fans liked his song enough to make the group a trending topic. As he finished his makeup and hair, he went to his hyungs. "Josh hyung, Taehoon hyung, did you see? We're trending!" He said excitedly, then, slightly more breathlessly, added, "my song is trending."
"I have a good feeling about tonight." He said suddenly, his eyes sparkling. "Like something good is about to happen."
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on Apr 1, 2020 12:27:39 GMT -8
Josh looked up at Kangwan from his seat in the hair and makeup chair and smiled at Kangwan's enthusiasm. He said softly, "I saw. The fans have been working really hard for us."
The nerves were jangling across his skin, and he glanced over at Taehoon, who seemed as calm as ever.
Taehoon couldn't move his head since the hair stylist was in the process of doing something complicated that Josh didn't quite understand with his hair, though Josh was sure it would end up looking good. Taehoon smiled too though and said, "I hadn't seen, but that's good. It feels good to know that your song and the choreo have been that well liked."
The makeup artist came to check that all of Josh's makeup was finished setting, touched up the last few things and waved him out of the chair so that one of the other members could take his turn. He was a little bit surprised that he was out of the chair before Taehoon, but it wasn't by much. He figured that it was because the makeup and hair that they'd decided on for Taehoon was more complicated than usual. Even so, despite having started quite a bit after Josh, Taehoon was out of his own chair moments later.
Taehoon gave Kangwan a quick hug and said, "I'm proud of your song, now finish getting ready."
He moved over to Josh and gave his arm a quick squeeze, "That's what was making you nervous, wasn't it?"
After Josh nodded, Taehoon have his arm another quick, comforting squeeze, and he said, "Let's start getting warmed up so that we're ready for the hard parts of the dance."
Shihyun was warming up his voice, and Qiwang appeared to be taking a nap while the stylists were taking care of his hair and make up. Josh and Taehoon stayed close enough to where hair and make up was being done that Kangwan would be able to talk to them.
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on Apr 6, 2020 17:46:09 GMT -8
Kangwan grinned as he got a hug from Taehoon, going back into the chair to finish getting ready as he was told to. He noticed Josh and Taehoon go off a little ways so they could warm up, and Kangwan looked at the other hyungs to see what they were up to, but decided the other two were being boring. He glanced at his phone again, sending Thomas a quick message, "I think tonight will be a good show. <3" He sent his boyfriend, before looking at social media again. Still trending, He thought excitedly. He posted a quick note on the fan cafe, titling it "trending" and simply writing "thank you" to the fans, with a cute smiley face and a heart, and signed with his name. Even if his intuition was wrong, and today was just a normal stage, they were still trending for his song, and that was special. At least to him.
As the hairstylist told him he could go, he jumped off the chair and went over to Taehoon and Josh, joining them in warming up. "Taehoon-hyung, can we go over that part of the dance I keep messing up before we go on stage? I want to make sure I can get it right on stage." He was getting it right about 80% of the time at this point, but he didn't want to get it wrong in front of all their fans and a camera audience.
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on Apr 15, 2020 19:38:45 GMT -8
Taehoon waved Kangwan closer when he asked about going over the dance. He said, "Finish stretching with us first, and then we'll go over it."
Once he was satisfied that Kangwan was stretched enough, he counted out the dance, starting from a few measures before the part that Kangwan struggled with, watching Kangwan in the bit of mirror they had to catch any issues. He made sure that he was in an easy spot for Kangwan to see.
Josh joined in as well, standing to the opposite side of Kangwan from Taehoon, making sure that whichever way he was facing, he'd be able to see one of the two of them to reference the steps.
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on May 14, 2020 18:23:05 GMT -8
"Okay," Kangwan said, going to finish stretching with the other two. He appreciated Taehoon going over the dance with him, and did the dance as Taehoon counted it out. As he finished with the part he was having trouble with little issue, he looked between his two hyungs expectantly. "I didn't particularly mess up this time, but I always feel like something's off when I do it. My footing? My timing? I don't know what!" He whined to them.
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on May 21, 2020 19:51:31 GMT -8
Josh told him reassuringly, "You looked fine this time, and you've been looking fine doing it in practice."
Taehoon nodded and added, "Your balance is a little bit off in a few places, and it's probably throwing you off, but you've been looking fine in practice the past several days. The fans are expecting you to be you not me or Josh or Qiwang, and I fully believe that you aren't going to mess it up."
They time until their stage was quickly draining away. Soon enough, staff was bustling the entire group into soundpacks and headsets and getting them to the immediate backstage area. Josh gathered them together to huddle quickly before it was time to go on stage. He said, "We've got this, there's a pretty big fan presence in the crowd right now, and we've been getting some attention for this song, so let's get out there and have a great live stage, OK?"
Taehoon squeezed his shoulder and gave a little nod.
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on Jul 6, 2020 23:05:13 GMT -8
Kangwan pouted at Josh, but appreciated his comment. "If you say so." He grumbled.
As they got huddled together, Kangwan felt the familiar rush of going onstage, and he started getting hyped up. "Hwaiting!" He said after Josh finished talking.
With what seemed like the blink of an eye, they were up on stage, and the song began. Kangwan had fun greeting the fans when he was able and was happy as he didn't mess up the part he was worried about, as Taehoon and Josh had assured him. He stuck his ending pose, breathing heavily but grinning to the fans, who clearly enjoyed their performance.
As they returned backstage and the mics were turned off, he grinned to his hyungs. "That turned out great! The fans loved it!" He said excitedly, rushing to his phone once they got to the dressing to see if Thomas had sent him anything. He had told Thomas he possibly wouldn't be able to get to his phone until the end of the broadcast, so he wasn't upset when his phone displayed no new notifications (yet). He checked twitter again, excited to see they were still trending, and telling his hyungs as such.
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on Jul 8, 2020 20:33:24 GMT -8
Josh was grinning as they came down off the stage. It was such a rush performing, even now, especially when the crowd was like this. There had been so many yells. Kangwan was right, they'd loved it. He was surprised when Kangwan let them know that they were still trending, and he checked his own phone. He nearly whispered, "We're trending higher than we were before the performance."
Taehoon put a hand on his shoulder, seeing Josh tense up a little. Josh didn't want to get his hopes up. There were other people who were there who were awesome too, and trending wasn't enough to get a win by itself. It's not like they'd ever gotten one before. Josh leaned against Taehoon for just a second, gathering himself, and then put his enthusiasm back on. He told Kangwan cheerfully, "Well, no matter what, that means that we've done a good job."
The wait through the rest of the performances seemed almost interminable. Josh could tell that he was pacing through the waiting room because eventually Taehoon grabbed his wrist gently and pulled him down to sit.
Taehoon was nervous too, but he was doing his best to have no expectations. They seemed to be in the running for the win, which would still be better than they'd ever done before. It was a good feeling. He mostly tried to focus on that and keeping Josh calm.
Qiwang and Shihyun had both somehow managed to fall asleep in the dressing room while they waited for the end of Inkigayo. Taehoon wasn't entirely sure how they managed it with all the nerves in the room.
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on Jul 19, 2020 21:25:00 GMT -8
Kangwan watched the other performances with Josh and Taehoon to try to take his mind off the fact they were trending, but his eyes felt like they were glued to his phone.
Soon enough, the end was near and they were told the return to stage would be in about five minutes. He checked his phone one last time, still trending. "Well, moment of truth." He told his hyungs. He felt as nervous as Josh looked, though he hoped he was hiding it a bit better.
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on Jul 19, 2020 22:34:05 GMT -8
Josh put on his stage face as he went back up onto the stage with the rest of the group. He was nearly vibrating with anticipation as Yuseong came up as one of the top three, and then one of the top two. His jaw dropped when they were declared the winner and their song started playing. He couldn't even fully process what the hosts were saying, but he grinned hugely and turned to the others, jumping about gleefully and saying, "We won! We won!"
He managed to pull himself together to take the trophy and thank the hosts, and then he turned to properly check on his group mates.
Taehoon froze when the announcement came up. No sound came out of his mouth, and he just mouthed, "We won?" a few times. Seeing the hosts hand Josh the trophy, and the others starting to celebrate, the immensity of it crashed down on him, and Taehoon felt tears well up in his eyes as sobbing started to basically rattle his frame. He ducked back behind the other's covering his face, and trying to hide how hard he was crying.
Shihyun and Qiwang didn't notice, too wrapped up in celebrating, but suddenly, Josh was there, wrapping arms around him and saying, "We won, I'm so happy, it's OK, it's OK!"
Taehoon clung to him, and sort of shuffled over only half realizing that Josh was giving his thank you speech. Josh thanked the fans and the audience and Kangwan for writing the song and Taehoon and Tai for choreography, and the CEO and managers, and all the staff. Then he held the microphone for Taehoon to choke out a thanks of his own before he was crying to hard again to say more and the microphone was passed down to one of the others.
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on Dec 21, 2020 15:44:02 GMT -8
Kangwan's eyes went wide as the announcer declared they won. He was crying a little, mainly because his first thought was, 'we did it, mom...,' plus the fact that it was his song that got them their first win. But as he looked over to his band mates, he noticed he wasn't the only crying, and went over to Taehoon and gave him a hug, and in the process also Josh. As Kangwan received the microphone, he voiced that first thought through sniffles, "Mom, hyung, we did it." He brought the mic down as he swallowed the lump in his throat and continued, thanking everyone else who had a hand in what became their first win. He made sure his other band mates got to say whatever words they wanted and then handed the mic back to the host, leading Taehoon off stage with some soothing mutterings.
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on Dec 26, 2020 2:28:59 GMT -8
Josh was full of happiness at the win, but he was slightly concerned as Taehoon leaned on him off the stage. Taehoon didn't seem to be able to stop sobbing, though Josh was relieved that there was a smile on his face despite the tears when his face came out of Josh's shoulder for a bit.
Taehoon was relieved that Josh was willing to let him cling, and he looked up through his tears and sobs to manage a smile at Kangwan for his reassuring words and hands on his elbow help guide him off stage. Taehoon could remember the last time he'd cried this much, cried much at all, in contrast to this, and while the emotion was similarly intense, this one was at least good. As they got back to their changing room, he managed to choke out past his sobs to Josh and Kangwan, "I'll be alright, I just, it's so much."
Once they were away from the cameras that weren't from their own company, Josh gathered him into another tight hug and said softly, "Yeah, we did it though, I never thought that we'd do it, and we couldn't have done it without your choreo and Kangwan's song."
Taehoon just leaned into it, trying to let himself relax and breathe, but it felt like he had no control over the sobs that shuddered through him. Qiwang had hovered awkwardly and patted his shoulder a little bit, but Taehoon felt like there was something important about the fact that Shihyeon wasn't there trying to comfort him the way that Josh and even Kangwan were. He whispered against Josh's neck, "Thank you."
Josh smiled at Kangwan over Taehoon's head and mouthed, "I've got this."
|
|
Idol - Vocalist/Songwriter / Seoul Cyber University Student (2025) Major: Applied Music.
Bisexual.
Dating Thomas Fan.
10/24/1999.
23.
Rabbit (Korea)
Authored by Redeim.
Offline.
|
Post by Kim Kangwan on May 9, 2021 17:59:47 GMT -8
Kangwan nodded, going and sitting on the couch in the dressing room, still sniffling a bit, and his chest still aching. He didn't realize winning would be filled with so many mixed feelings. He wished his mom and brother could've been in the crowd, watching him, and he curled in on himself. He was surprised by his phone buzzing, but the text message wasn't from Thomas.
It was from his dad.
"Congratulations, Kangwannie." It read in Korean.
His dad had been watching his performance. Had he watched all of them? Or just happened to tune in to this one? He had a feeling it was the former, and he buried his face as he wrapped his arms around his legs.
Qiwang came over to check on him at some point, seeming to notice the mood of the room had this undertone of somberness with two members crying, but Kangwan insisted he was fine, just overbearingly happy. It wasn't really a lie, but it wasn't the whole truth, either.
He wondered fleetingly what it would take to convince his dad to move back to Korea. It would mean that much more to see a family member in the audience. He couldn't believe how far his relationship with his father had come since he first moved to the U.S. to live with him. If he had told 16-year-old Kangwan that he really wanted his dad with him when he returned to Korean, younger him wouldn't have believed it. He managed to calm down enough that just the occasional tear slipped out and he was sniffing, but he could manage a smile that didn't look completely forced, and he pocketed his phone and went to join Qiwang with silly, random celebratory dances, glancing to Taehoon to check how he was doing.
|
|
Kpop Idol, Yuseong's Leader.
Gay (Secretively).
Single.
01/17/1993.
29.
Monkey (Korea)
Authored by Etienne.
Offline.
|
Post by Joshua Kim Jaeseo on May 16, 2021 11:36:45 GMT -8
If it had just been him, Josh would have been bouncing around the room with Qiwang and Shihyun. He tightened his arms around Taehoon and rubbed his back, slightly concerned that his best friend didn't seem to be able to stop crying, though the sobs had gotten a little quieter and didn't seem to shudder through his entire frame quite as much. Over Taehoon's head, he asked Kangwan softly, "You alright? I know that even with something so good, it can be overwhelming."
Even though his own initial response was more of the jumping and celebratory variety, he felt right being over there with Taehoon and trying to check in on Kangwan. When he'd first debuted, he'd not felt like he had any idea how to be a leader, but maybe stuff like this was an important part of it, and maybe he'd gotten to be not so bad at it over the years.
The manager came in then, and he gave Josh and Taehoon a questioning look, clearly also a little concerned that Taehoon was still crying. The manager said, "I just got of the phone with the boss, and I've got permission to take you all out to a restaurant to celebrate."
Josh looked down at Taehoon and told the manager softly, "You should take the others and drop the two of us back at the dorm. I think that he isn't quite up to it tonight."
The manager nodded, clearly a little disconcerted by the usually calm, composed Taehoon, who'd pretty much never openly cried in front of members or staff, being a crying mess. Josh glanced at Kangwan, wanting to check in on how the youngest member was handling the situation.
|
|
